For years, I've been a mentor for young ladies. A part of different youth groups, I have worked with a lot of teenage girls and the problems that follow them. My go-to phrase when we talk (whether it be about drinking, sex, college admissions, weight [gosh girls think a lot about their weight], etc.), I always tell them:
You are worth itI can say that to them with every confidence that they are, indeed, worth it. They are beautiful. They are funny. They are loved. They are worth it.
What has occurred to me though, is that I can say it until I'm blue in the face. I can write it on mirrors and send flowers and letters. But I can't make them believe that they're worth it. It's all internal. These beautiful, talented, worthy ladies are worth love and happiness. But it's up to them to believe it. I can't make them believe it- it's a true change of heart.
I am worth it. I can say it myself until I'm blue in the face. I know it. I'm worthy of love and happiness. So how many times do I say it before I begin to believe it? How many times do I say it before I believe that I'm actually worth it; that I'm worth love and happiness. That I'm worthy enough to have people that love me enough to want to be an active part of my life. That I'm worthy enough to have people in my life that want to fight for me.
People fight in relationships. People fight for relationships. If a relationship means this much to you, aren't you going to fight like hell to save it? No? Well then, those are the experiences that make us feel like we're not worth it. That we're not worth fighting for, that we're not worth saving this relationship over.
Jesus tells everyone to
"love our neighbors as yourself." (Luke 10:27)That's sentimental, I know. But the truth is, I want to love my neighbor better than I love myself. I want to love myself like I love my neighbor. I want give myself grace like I give grace to others. I want to forgive myself like I'm able to forgive others. Why is that so hard?
My prayers go out to those who don't feel worthy. Fighting for a relationship takes up so much energy, and maybe it's a relationship that isn't worth fighting for. That's up to you decide. But, I'm with you. I'm with you in this fight. I'll tell you just as often that you're worthy as I tell myself this:
You are worthy. You are worthy. You are worthy of love and happiness. You are worth fighting for. Thanks be to God that you are worthy.
One of my favorite preachers, Amy Jacks Dean, speaks so much to this on her sermon called Discovering a Well in the Desert. I encourage you to listen and reflect. I'll do the same.
